I always used to wonder how some people could be so heartless or could just keep to themselves without helping others. I think I found the reason why, or at least one of the reasons. In a world full of betrayal, disappointments and neglect, it’s very easy to just build a wall around your heart to avoid all the pain that comes from these things.

I believe the main reason we often get disappointed by people is because we have high expectations towards them. For example, if someone was in need of food and you offered to give them some of yours, you may expect them to also give you something of theirs the next time you’re in need. However, that’s where we usually go wrong, we shouldn’t expect people to do what we did for them.

This year has been a real eye opener for me. I’m always the shoulder to cry on for many people, I sacrifice a lot of my time and whatever I have for others when they need it. So when I was going through certain things, I expected the same to be returned to me, however, that wasn’t the case. I began to feel very alone and hurt that people turned their backs on me. I ran to God and asked him to help me to forgive those people. He comforted me and reminded me not to put my trust in man but only in Him. I was really close to saying “from now on, it’s going to be me, myself and I”, but God had to remind me of certain things.

First of all, the fact that He blessed me in order to be a blessing unto others and secondly, the fact that He created me to be caring and compassionate to others. So for me to choose not to help others anymore because of how ungrateful they have been, is simply the same as walking in a different identity.

The Lord also reminded me of Jesus being betrayed by His own disciples and neglected by the world. He went to His own and His own people did not receive Him (John 1:11). So imagine if Jesus Christ decided not to do good anymore or not to fulfil the purpose for which He came into this world just because of others!

Why am I sharing all of this with you? Because I want to encourage you to continue doing good. Continue to help others even when you’ve been hurt. Continue to be the light in darkness. Don’t stop. Don’t stop being who God has called you to be. Don’t let others make you bitter. Just think about all the times you’ve done wrong and yet God still showers you with love and grace. We are called to show that same love and walk like Jesus did. We are being transformed daily from our own selfish desires to enable us to lay our lives down for others.

Lastly, we shouldn’t expect our rewards from man. When you lend or do good, don’t expect anything in return and your reward will be great from our Heavenly Father (Luke 6:35). I know it can be very exhausting at times to do so much for others and not be appreciated. But God sees it all, He is super proud of you and happy to call you His child. It’s never worth losing yourself, no matter how bad you want to give the world a taste of its own bitter medicine.

If you’re hurting or struggling to forgive others, you should pray about it. Also pray that God will give you wisdom when helping others. Never allow someone’s behaviour to change who you are. Put your trust in God alone, He will never leave you or forsake you.