Imagine a world where everyone was the same. Exactly the same. Same hair, same body, same clothes, same cars, same phones, same personalities, same laughter, same walk, same talents…etc. Yeah. You get the point lol. You wouldn’t want a world like that would you?

God made us all unique and different but we are constantly trying to be the same as one another. In the world we live in, ladies are constantly comparing their appearance with one another or even worse with celebrities. “Oh my friend has this weave and makeup so I have to have it no matter what it costs”, or “this girl has a nice figure so I’m going to starve myself to get a body like that”. You see comparison brings jealousy and a feeling of not being good enough. We are not content with who we are or how beautiful being unique makes us.

And we have guys constantly in competition with one another, for example who can get the latest gadgets or who can “secure” a lady first. Lol I remember a few years ago in school there was a thing with guys competing to see who can get into bed with their girlfriend the quickest. Very silly huh? But yeah it was actually a thing and I’m sure it’s still happening with some guys. What’s the point of that anyway? You know in your heart you’re a good person, so why do things just to “fit in”. God did not call us to fit in with the world but to stand out, you are the light (Matthew 5:14).

You may be thinking comparison only happens when you’re in the world and chasing after material things but it’s really not. When you come into Christ, you can easily find yourself questioning your identity and your God given gifts with others.

Let me share with you how comparing myself to others and trying to be like them affected me greatly.

When I first got saved, I was just minding my own business and trying to build a personal relationship with God. Then all of a sudden, I would go to church and start looking around at the people and comparing their actions and looks to mine. At one point I started to wonder if there was something wrong with me. Because I did not cry during worship & I didn’t fall on the floor when I was prayed for like others were. Sounds silly huh? Lol I know! But I spent a long time doing that, instead of focusing on what was being preached, I was looking at the actions of people. It didn’t stop there, at home I would go on YouTube to watch Christian channels. And instead of listening to their tips and stuff, I started to envy them! I wanted to be just like them. I got caught up in their lives and how on fire they were for God and I wanted the same! I mean it’s not a bad thing to want to be on fire for God, but what’s bad is if you start getting jealous about what they’re doing. I remember going down on my knees and asking God to make me like them instead of asking him for his personal will to be done in my life.

Later on, I realised that comparing my walk with others was constantly making me unhappy about myself and my relationship with him! I was blinded and ceased to see the beautiful things God was doing in my life. Not only did comparison make me unhappy but it also caused me to be stagnant in my walk. Instead of working on myself and allowing God to mould me, I was pretending to have it all together and started deceiving myself, which led to no growth in my walk, I was stuck at the same place.

I kept going through many trials and instead of learning from them and allowing them to teach me, I was upset and thought Gods love for me decreased. I thought it was unfair that other people’s walk was going so smoothly and mine just had so many ups and downs.

Another way of comparing yourself with others is by thinking their life is perfect and always going so well whilst yours seems to be trembling down. Trial after trial after trial. The truth is behind the scenes you don’t know what someone is really going through so you shouldn’t compare yourself with the side they have decided to show the world.

Or sometimes you just don’t know what someone has been through to get to where they are now. I remember I always used think it was unfair that other Christians didn’t have anything going wrong in their lives and they seemed to be doing very well. But what I refused to notice was that in order for them to be at the stage they were at, they must’ve been through all the tests and trials which now makes them stronger.

After a while of comparing my Christian walk with others, I decided to consecrate myself away from social media and focus solely on my personal walk with Christ. During that time I learnt the importance of going through trails as a Christian.

• Trials help to build up your faith and trust in God. Imagine if you had a perfect life, and didn’t go through any trials? You’d probably think everything is by your strength and you wouldn’t feel the need to go to God. But when you go through trials and tribulations, it makes you depend on God totally and have faith that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6).
• Trials makes you a stronger person. You wouldn’t know what you are capable of going through if nothing has happened to you. There’s been so many things/obstacles that has come my way which I never thought I had the strength to overcome but I did.
• Trials humble you. You are not capable of doing everything by yourself (lezz be honest lol). When you go through trials, you find out that you actually need to humble yourself and seek help from God and other believers.
• Trials make you unique. Everyone’s story is different. We all go through different things, sometimes similar, but what we learn from them will differ. Trails make you who you are.
• Trials gives you a testimony! Very often we want to have testimonies without going through the actual test. But it has to be done so that we can teach others what we learnt during that period of our lives. Testifying will give others hope that their problems will not last forever. Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning (psalm 30:5).

Please understand that everyone’s walk with God is different. Do not compare the season you’re in with someone else’s. Do not envy what others are doing in the kingdom, your turn will come. They had to go through a process in order to be the inspiring person you see them to be right now! Sometimes God needs to break you in order to fix you. Everyone’s road is different, but we all have the same destinations. Trust God and trust your process. He has great plans for you (Jeremiah 29:11). We all have different purposes for being on this earth. Do not try to copy others. Focus on God and not other people so that you’ll be able to learn and trust in him in order to grow and to be content.

Always remember that you are not like anyone else and that’s your power. Stop trying to be like others. God has made you this way and has planned things out just for you! Be happy that you’re unique, there’s beauty in it.